“Don’t believe the hype!” – Flavor Flav
I can hear the gasps of horror already! Surely not Hobart’s most recent and already much loved addition to the burger scene?! Sacrilege!!
Just like my woefully inadequate guttering has been in a perpetual state of flood over the last two weeks, my Facebook news feed has been subjected to a deluge of rapturous Burger Haus burger love!
“Awesome”, “Yummy”, “Fantastic”, “Delicious”, “Best in Hobart”… Just check out the reviews on their Facebook page and you’ll see what I mean. Of the first 20 reviews I scrolled through, only two people had the audacity to suggest that their meals were anything but the epitome of burger nirvana. Heretics!
On walking up the front steps of Burger Haus the tone of the cafe was immediately apparent. A mix of 80s hits and charcoal beef wafted out the front door to warmly greet our ears and nose. The interior is light and airy, with some fantastic 80s kitsch collectibles strategically scattered throughout, including the first working record player I’ve seen in years! Not 100% sure if it was actually connected to the speakers, but very cool nonetheless!
While the aesthetics were welcoming, the staff were not. We quickly worked out that you picked your own table (either indoors, including a window bar, or outdoors), but took a little longer to realise that no one was going to take our order and that we had to place it ourselves. Not an issue, but it’s always nice to have a friendly face let you know what the deal is in advance. Unfortunately the service didn’t improve as the meal went on. Lackadaisical, more concerned with their own conversations than the needs of their diners, generally very average.
We then settled in to peruse the menu. Wow…!! The double sided Burger Haus menu reads like Penthouse for gastronomes!! (Part 1 – Part 2)
Beef burgers, lamb burgers, chicken burgers, schnitzel burgers, scotch fillet burgers, salmon burgers, pork burgers, vegetarian burgers <take a breath!> wings, ribs, crepes, cakes, gourmet milkshakes…the list is endless and hits every single food button this little clown could possibly have!! How could we go wrong?
While I would normally go for something a little more exotic, in the interests of a fair comparison I decided to try The Vintage, including cheese, pickles and bacon as extras. Karen, on the other hand, decided to go a little bit more left field and ordered the Electric Blue, consisting of a beef patty, fig chutney, tomato relish, aioli, blue cheese(!), caramelised pear, rocket and red onion.
While it looked quite pleasing to the eye, in the end The Vintage was such a let down. Perhaps after all the social hype there was a hint of ‘The bigger they are, the harder they fall’ in the mix, but I definitely expected better.
The patty should be the star of the show, yet in this case it got a whopping case of stage fright! Overcooked, dry, lacking seasoning. About the only thing in its favour was the acrid and smoky charcoal from the grill. The patty certainly wasn’t bad, and I guess some may like their beef done to death, but it was well short of the fantastic flavours and textures we recently experienced at The Winston and Tasman Quartermasters.
The best aspect of this burger had to be the bacon! I haven’t had better anywhere in Hobart. Crunchy, but not overly dry. Salty, and so very moreish! Forget Cleopatra’s milk bath, my vote is for the Burger Haus Bacon Bath!!
The salad was fresh, yet after paying extra for pickles I was pretty peeved to find that they were either infinitesimally small, or missing. I suspect the latter and the burger suffered for the lack.
Overall Karen was pretty happy with her choice. When the ratio of blue cheese to pear to beef patty was just right the flavour combination was awesome, yet unfortunately the cheese seemed to have been applied inconsistently resulting in some mouthfuls that were overly funky, and yet others that were all beef. Her only other comment was that the choice of the long pide, instead of a round bun, meant that the ends of the pide contained only salad (as you can see in the photo above). All minor issues, but enough to take it from ‘great’ down to ‘good’.
Now it’s time for what can only be described as a genuine jaw dropping, smile inducing food moment. Well, drink moment might be more apt…because the chocolate milkshake I had together with my burger was the absolute BOMB!!
It is by far the best, the most chocolatey, the smoothest, the sweetest and the coolest milkshake I have EVER had!! And how sexy is that old skool paper straw?!
I’ll leave it John Travolta to sum it up (language warning):
It was a good meal, but Flavor Flav would have a been a welcome third wheel at our table.
The menu is so extensive and diverse that I have to wonder whether its a case of ‘Jack of all trades, master of none’. While it would be a shame to cut the menu back, it may be in their best interest to consider doing so.
On the other hand, I can quite safely say that I’ll be back to try their crepes, their range of Serendipity ice creams (see photo below), perhaps another burger, and most definitely the Ferrero Rocher gourmet milkshake!!
At $13 this burger is in white collar territory, but it doesn’t come anywhere near challenging top spot.
Taste – 3.5/5
Patty – 2/5
Bun – 4.5/5
Ingredients – 3/5
Condiments – 3/5
Presentation – 4/5
Stuffable* – Yes
Value – 3.5/5
Overall – 3/5
*Can you stuff it in your face without a knife and fork?
White Collar Burgers
1. The Winston – 5/5
2. Tasman Quartermasters – 4.5/5
3. Chrome – 4/5
4. Burger Haus – 3/5
5. Burger Got Soul – 2.5/5
Blue Collar Burgers
1. Red Jaffa – 4.5/5
2. Budgie Smugglers – 4.5/5
3. Argyle Take Away – 3.5/5
4. Atlantis Takeaway – 2.5/5